Happy Oscar week my fellow Observers! Could you feel the excitement in the air as we all waited eagerly in front of our televisions to watch the entire days events? From the pre-dawn hour reports on HLN and CNN to the red carpet arrivals and fashion awards on E! and then on to the ceremony itself. From best sound editing all the way up the categories to best picture on ABC. Didn't you all think that is was the most wonderful event you've ever seen?....... Me neither!
Among the many things in our society that I can't stand, one of them at the top of my list has to be award shows. I think it's because that although we are supposed to be celebrating the best of whatever we are handing awards out for that week, we are actually demonstrating the worst about ourselves. Where else, besides an award show, can you see hundreds of millionaires competing with each other to see who is best at.... everything. Not only best at what they do but also best at how their dressed to find out who's best at what they do. The Academy Awards is the "best" example of American decadence that I can think of. Millions upon millions of dollars spent on.... Nothing! The gum stuck to my red carpet rage is that most of the attendees, the rest of the year, are constantly bombarding the airwaves and periodicals promoting their charities and/or foundations. Repeatedly reminding us of all the good they do for the world, they just need us to help them. Maybe they need our help because they keep spending their money on award shows. This years Academy Awards cost a tidy $40,000,000.00. That's seven zeros, my loyal reader.... Seven. That was just on the ceremony. That didn't include the pre and after parties which were around another 4.3 million. The goodie bags handed out to the "losing" nominees to the tune of $150,000.00 each for a total of 15 million. Now I understand that most of these "gifts'" are donated by companies for advertising purposes, but the monetary value of them is valid. And lets not forget the wardrobes. An average "conservative" actresses night out at the Oscars starts with a gown, minimum $15,000.00, shoes $1500.00, 85% of all actresses hire a "fashion stylist" at an average of $7000.00 per day for an average of 3 days for an average total of $21,000.00, an average cost for beauty prep is $3500.00 and another $1500.00 on hair. The average "conservative" cost per actress is $42,500.00. And this number is me being generous with their "average" humility. It also does not include jewelry. And while researching the cost of all this peacock posturing I realized, as with most things, "conservative" is indeed relative. Some actresses have been known to spend as much as $250,000.00 to upwards of $750,000.00 on a gown and up to $1,000,000.00 on jewelry. Now that's dressed to kill. Specifically the homeless, the unemployed and pretty much anyone else that is not a member of the upper 1%. I will give a certain amount of credit to the actresses who "borrow" gowns and jewelry for advertising consideration, but not that much more than the ones who foot the bill. My generosity only goes so far. Even though they choose to spend less than their colleagues, it still is excessiveness on a grand scale. Their beauty regiment costs alone can exceed some families annual income. The men on the other hand are a little better. Without getting into the specifics of what their "manscaping" regiments entail (and believe me, you don't want to know...I didn't) most actors average around $36,000.00 for their monkey suit boys night out. And the excessive spending isn't just limited to the academy arrogance and the nominee nimrods. Companies pay more than 3.2 million for sixty seconds of advertising airtime. The media promotes these shows for weeks on end. Even the politicians get in on the action whenever possible to keep those celebrity donations and endorsements rolling in. All in all, just one award show can realistically cost more than a quarter of a billion dollars for one night. I realize that The Academy Awards is on the grandest level of this scale, but I don't think it really matters what the venue is when some people have no problem spending this amount of money on one night when others have no money for food or homes or medicine or heat. I can think of no lower disregard for humanity.
So, why do we watch? Why do we feed these peoples egos? Why would we even care about a life that most of us will never know? I'm having some problems understanding this. Are people's lives so deprived that the only way they can escape the reality of them is to watch these shows? Not only do we watch, we watch sometimes with record breaking numbers. Maybe we want to see, what my grandmother used to call, "how the other half lives". Only problem is that it's a lot less than half. Grandma was always such an optimist. Maybe we like to look at the things we don't have. Maybe it allows us to fantasize about living a better life. Whatever the reason, at least the number of viewers fell off this year by 16%. I like that. Maybe Americans are getting as sick of these selfish millionaires as much as I am. One can only hope. This year only 36.6 million watched, down from 43.7 million the previous year, up from 40.3 million the year before that. It seems that a comedian talk show host and Peter Griffith are more popular than Doogie Howser. That weird Italian, wanna be director kid that crawls through second story windows kinda creeped me out too. I just can't decide what I have the most contempt for. Seth MacFarlane dressed as the Flying Nun (Sally Field was ticked), playing with sock puppets and singing about breasts, DeGeneres taking a "selfie" tweet with all her other Oscar twits or Neil Patrick Harris coming out on live TV (pun intended) in his tidy whiteys. Now that I think about it.... It's a three way tie. Why should I waste my time deciding on which one of these morons to hold in higher regard?
Another thing I can't figure out is why the winners of these gold thingies (why are they always gold anyway?) almost always thank god first. Like if there was a god, he would really care enough to help decide the winners of these things. That's right people... gods a big fan. Do these people ever actually listen to what's spewing out of their ignorant mouths? "I have to thank god.". For what? Giving you a little gold man while he lets a veteran freeze to death because he couldn't afford to heat his home? Giving you a worthless pat on the back while food banks stand empty? Feed your ego to ultimate levels while families lose their homes? Why would god do that? And if that's what your god does, I thank every atheist bone in my body that I don't believe in him. He's as bad as your are. And if any of the people who watch these things agree with these jerks, they may want to rethink who they're praying to. It might just be a waste of time after all. God is too busy deciding who wins best original screenplay to be bothered with your triple bypass surgery this coming Tuesday.
I think the reason that most of these types of events have such popularity is that they are an escape for a lot of us. A way to forget, if only for a few short hours, how sad the world in general can be. It's a way for us to feel like we are a part of that world, even if it is just a fantasy. What gets my little gold goat is that most of these celebrities, actors, musicians, athletes, and writers take advantage of that fact and actually feed it. Isn't it gratifying enough for these people that they've made it to the top level of their particular careers? By attending these events and individually spending amounts of cash that would feed a small town for a month to meet the status quo, they do an injustice to their art or sport. By taking such an elitist standpoint they have forgotten where they came from, how many are still struggling, how lucky they are and how humble they should be. 98% of their fellow artists and athletes will never experience what they have. The fact is, that I have more respect for the ones who are not making millions and keep performing, writing and competing because they love what they do instead of some ungrateful narcissist in the public eye who flaunts what they have. All at the same time trying to sell us on how much they are doing to help the less fortunate. Sorry Skippy, your not that good an actor, at least not to me. When was the love of One's craft and the desire to help those in need replaced by pomp and circumstance? When did we start caring more about the fantasy to the point where we couldn't see the need for the reality of life? When did little gold statues become more important than a fellow human being? I hear people say "It's just one night a year", but when the cost of that "one night" could do so much for those who need it, I have a lot of trouble suffering those who support it. Strictly an Observation. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to look for some of my grandmother's optimism.
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